Let’s Talk

No, I am not bringing out my inner Oprah or Ellen, I was thinking back to the olden days when the only way we had to share information was pretty basic. There was probably a telephone hanging on the wall in the kitchen, and if you were really lucky there was another phone in the living room or maybe on the nightstand in your parents’ room. But in my house that room was pretty much off limits. The use of the phone was pretty much off limits also. In the beginning we had a party line, shared by a couple of neighbors. My parents really didn’t let us waste much time on the phone. If looking for something a little more official you wrote a letter, using cursive writing or typewriter if you had the class in the 7th grade or so. That was about it. Oh, one more option was hopping on your bicycle, or if you were a little older, your first car, and taking a ride to the person you wanted to talk to.

Now adays we have so many ways to share ideas and thoughts. Cell phones replaced the phone on the wall. You have text, email, Facetime, Zoom. IM, DM, Messenger along with many other ways to get your thoughts, questions, and complaints from one person to the other. Sometimes that person is busy, it goes to voicemail never to be returned. Or the electronic letter just doesn’t get a look at, falling further and further down the stack of other messages just taking up space out on the internet.

It seems like sometimes you have other issues. You send the message electronically to whoever, or maybe you post on a social media platform and it seems the person you are trying to create a discussion with reacts in a way you would have never expected. The person becomes a little braver for some reason, maybe it is easier to be difficult sitting behind a keyboard, in a Dr Jekyll/ Mister Hyde kind of way. The person in person is all cooperative and helpful but given the protection of a keyboard or internet they turn into a pain in the posterior.

In these days of Covid more and more things are taking place online rather in person. If you had an issue in the past, paraphrasing the words of a politician, you might be taking the guy out behind the barn to settle the issue. Afterwards you would, if you were old enough to have a beer, talk and laugh about it. Then afterwards you walk away friends probably laughing retelling the story years later. Things have changed in this political climate. We can’t have any conversation with someone that has any political leanings to it, with someone of a different leaning. It turns into an ugly argument in person or on social media. Your point of view on anything, according to others of different viewpoints, becomes something of a wedge between you, friends, family, and coworkers.

We need to get back to basic civility in our conversations. When talking to others about issues we are concerned about we need to be able to share a message of the problem and a solution that we feel will solve the problem. It is easy for us in our organization because we stick to motorcyclist issues. It is something we know and care about. When we are deciding what we our concerns are legislatively, we create and share, as in my service writer days complaint, cause, correction. If it is our profiling issue that is the cause of why we are at the Capitol, the complaint is police or some other group targeting motorcyclists or groups. The cause is the patch on the person’s jacket and our correction is to create a guideline for training to make sure it does not happen in Wisconsin.

We as a group don’t need to start yelling and screaming at each other to get our points across. We can remain firm in our decisions, not backing down without having our behavior deteriorate to levels that may hurt the cause. I know personally, I tend to shut out someone if they start raising their voice or start to drop a few f bombs. If I read an email and someone is coming across with snarky comments and maybe I start to feel uncomfortable, and yes, I get those, I usually try not to respond in those same tones. I feel that it is unprofessional and does not usually end well.
Hopefully, we all take a few seconds or minutes, or in the case of that really nasty message a day or two to think about an appropriate response to the issue raised. Better yet, pick up the phone or walk up to the person that is having an issue and have a conversation. Be able to explain the reasons you decided or support the issue and listen to their response. Open discussion about an issue is the best way to put a matter to rest. Not disagreeing and then not sharing a reason why.

By the time you are reading this S.T.E.A.M. will be done for 2021, I want to thank everyone that worked putting on this important conference. It takes many people to get this up and running. Thanks to Jen Dewitz for herding all the cats to get the funds, raffle prizes, to set up the hotel and all those little details. Thanks to Laurie and Doris for all of your hard work. Thanks to all that presented, served food or beverages or was just there to learn something new. It is a great time, an educational time, and a time to share great thoughts with friends from around the Midwest with a like mind. More about this next month.

John